CHRISTMAS SPECIAL: Jingle All the Way (1996)

Jingle All the Way

Happy holidays, everyone – the Alcohollywood Christmas special episode is here! This time, guests Julia and Todd join us as we take on the 1996 Arnold Schwarzenegger stinker Jingle All the Way, in which Arnold flexes his comedy muscles as a workaholic dad whose son’s love is contingent on the acquisition of the hot new Turbo Man toy. This ends up leading him on a merry last-minute chase through the Twin Cities, while crazy post office worker Sinbad is hot on his heels.

The movie actually has its funny moments, mostly coming from Phil Hartman’s sleazy bachelor Ted, and it teeters on the edge of actually poking fun at the Christmas commercialism machine, only to back out at the last minute to let Arnold punch something. It’s a mess, but an interesting one, and we’ve got the custom cocktail and drinking rules to help you through your holiday viewing!

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THIS EPISODE’S DRINK: Ginger All the Way

2 parts spiced rum
1 part vanilla vodka
1 part ginger liqueur
Splash, stout (e.g. Guinness)
Gingerbread tincture: ginger, molasses, cloves, allspice

Make tincture by infusing spirit with aforementioned spices; Combine ingredients and drops of tincture (to taste); stir.

DRINKING RULES FOR JINGLE ALL THE WAY:

  1. Whenever someone says “Turbo Man” (drink twice whenever Arnold says it)
  2. Anytime you see cartoony violence (pratfalls, kicks to the nuts, etc.)
  3. Every time you hear a new Christmas song

FINISH YOUR DRINK WHEN:

Jamie (Jake Lloyd) says, “Why do I need a doll when I’ve got the real Turbo Man at home?”

Join us on the other side of the New Year, where we take on Darren Aronofsky’s debut film Pi! In the meantime, feed your giving spirit this holiday season by donating to the Indiegogo for Ephebophilia, the show Clint is directing in the Chicago area!

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About Alcohollywood Staff

The film staff of the film website/podcast Alcohollywood.

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