Hercules (2014)

hercules

I AM HERCULES! Just in time for Dwayne Johnson’s latest turn in Furious 7, this week returning guest Craig joins us to talk last year’s Rock-tastic adventure Hercules! Directed by Brett “I don’t have a style” Ratner, this sword-and-sandal epic remodels Herc as a flawed strongman with a coterie of badasses (including Ian McShane and Rufus Sewell) who help him build up the legend of Hercules so they can get money. However, when Lord Cotys (John Hurt) tasks them to take down an army of centaurs, Herc and crew get more than they bargained for. The film’s an enjoyable trifle, and we have a great deal of fun discussing The Rock’s stretch marks, the merits of “shield wall” class, and much more. Enjoy, along with our custom cocktail and drinking game!

Related Links:
Clint’s Fresh Pour review of Hercules

LISTEN HERE OR DOWNLOAD:

THIS EPISODE’S DRINK: Rock of Rages

This drink was a bit of a Labor for us (eh? EH?), as we wanted to combine the sweet charisma of The Rock with some flavors that evoke the myth of Hercules. To that end, our central component is Ouzo, which is a Greek aperitif, along with blood oranges for some extra Greek flavor. We then finish it off with hard apple cider (since it’s hard to get ahold of juice from the real Apples of the Hesperides, especially since they’re out of season) to give it a sweeter finish and some fizziness.

1 part Ouzo
2 parts vodka
5 parts hard apple cider
1 part blood orange syrup

  • To make the blood orange syrup – mix equal parts of blood orange juice and sugar, with a splash of water, and heat until thickened.
  • Combine Ouzo, syrup and vodka in a shaker with ice; fill rocks glass with whiskey stone or ice sphere and pour straight. Top with hard apple cider and stir to combine.

DRINKING RULES FOR HERCULES:

  1. Whenever one of Herc’s Avengers crew do a creative kill (Herc-assists)
  2. Every time someone brings up one of the Twelve Labors
  3. Any time someone says or does the ‘shield wall’

FINISH YOUR DRINK WHEN:

Hercules shouts who he is in a very loud fashion, in all his glistening, shirtless glory.

Join us next week as we drink ourselves to death Lost Weekend-style with the Nic Cage alcoholism drama Leaving Las Vegas!

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About Clint Worthington

Clint Worthington is a Chicago-based film/TV critic and podcaster. A member of the Chicago Film Critics Association, you can find his other film work at Consequence of Sound (where he is a Senior Staff Writer), Crooked Marquee, IndieWire and UPROXX. He is also the co-host of Nathan Rabin's Happy Cast.

One thought on “Hercules (2014)

  1. Out of all the historical anachronisms in this movie based on a Greek myth, you decided to point out the chariot archers and flaming arrows during the second battle scene. This movie takes place around 368 BC, which is ridiculous considering the mythical figure of Hercules lived almost a millennia before that.

    Your point that horse archery did not exist until the Mongols is exposes your woeful lack of historical knowledge. There is ancient Assyrian artwork from the 9th century BC depicting mounted archers, 2000 years before the time of Ghenghis Khan. Moreover, the actual thing depicted in the movie, chariot born archers, are even more ancient. The Standard of Ur from 2500 BC shows chariots with javelin men and there are reliefs of the Battle of Kadesh in 1300 BC with chariot archers.

    As to flaming arrows, one of the earliest recorded uses was during the siege of Tel Lachish in 701 BC.

    I realize that I might come off as a crazy person bringing this up over a year after you put this podcast out, and well I may be, but something compelled me to address this.

    All that said, I love the show and appreciate your work. But maybe stick to Hard Science™ and leave the Hard History™ to the rest of us 😉

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